COUP DE GRACE
Wiretapping and the Quiet Death of a Free Country
idea of American democracy received it's final coup de
grace from Bushco™ this week and, thanks to the invisible
Democrats, it died peacefully in its sleep.
Firstly, the House passed the bill
to allow warrantless wiretapping by a 232-191 vote Thursday night.
Secondly, they passed
Bush's pet torture bill 254-168 thus enabling the C-in-C to interpret the
Geneva Convention more loosely than a free jazz combo. The torture bill incorporates,
amongst many other nasty surprises, a frighteningly broad (i.e., infinitely
interpretable) definition of 'enemy combatant' and the sudden end of habeas
corpus as a legal principle.
implications of Bush's new laws are both terrifying and
depressing. In the space of 24 hours, the basic safeguards
of our legal system have been gutted, filleted, and served
up as a tasty pre-election treat. And for what? So Bush
can avoid impeachment proceedings in the unlikely event
that the Democrats take back the House in November and
grow a pair? (Sorry, warrantless wiretapping is legal...
sorry, detainment without due process is legal... sorry,
torture is legal as long as rape and/or mutilation do not
occur...) This must be the first time in our history that
the people have been so royally screwed for the sole purpose
of saving the presidential hide.
if you're a flag-wrapped, clueless wingnut, I'm sure you'll
be celebrating today. To you, it's all just a partisan
game and your quarterback has scored another great touchdown.
But one day, when you're all yelled-out and your fetish
for authority figures is finally exhausted, you might just
wonder what happened to that free country we always used
to talk about. You might wonder if it was really worth
shredding two centuries of democracy just to save George
Bush from possible impeachment.
You can't blame Bush for exercising his roach-like will to survive, it's all
he knows. But you can certainly blame the apologists and propagandists who
polish that stinking turd of self-interest to make it resemble rational policy.
Forgive the wingnuts, for they know not what they do. (Link
WORDS AND BAD GAS
Deny Bushco™ Influence on Pre-election gas prices
Hastert: lying, fat fuck? (note: Fox News-style question
percent of Americans believe Bushco™ are
massaging gas prices as a pre-election bribe even though
they strenuously deny it. "I have been amused by ...
the attempt by some people to say that the president has
been rigging gas prices, which would give him the kind
of magisterial clout unknown to any other human being." slimed
Tony Snow, official White House condescending bastard.
The President is not a 'magician,' the wingnuts remind us. But he'd have to
be in order to influence the price of gas peddled by GOP-friendly multinationals
because the market is a mysterious force of nature beyond all human control.
It's as if the oil companies would have no interest in keeping Bushco™ in
power because they stand to gain nothing from Durr Feuhrer's continuing adventures
in the Mid-East where oil squirts out of the ground. Who could dream such a
crazy conspiracy? Such naivete.
Strangely, for a government pleading ignorance (a first time without justification),
it sure looks like they want to take the credit for gasoline's new-found affordability. "Gas
prices are falling," yells
Hastert in his latest save-the-GOP-majority rant. "The nation and
the world still need the Congress to lead, and Republicans are meeting that
need every day."
So which is it? Are they claiming no control or full credit? (Link
Denounces Warrantless Surveillance Opponents as Terrorist
sack of shit, Dennis Hastert, today slammed those who voted
against the bill to make Bush's warrantless wiretapping
"Democrat Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi and 159 of her Democrat colleagues
voted today in favor of more rights for terrorists," Hastert
said in a statement. "So the same terrorists who plan to harm innocent
Americans and their freedom worldwide would be coddled, if we followed the Democrat
Hastert and the wingnuts, frothed up with spite and rattling with busted logic,
truly are a disgrace to an already terminally fucked democracy. (Link
History Smile Fondly on Our Dear Leader?
that final brush has been cleared, the Grim Reaper comes
a knockin' and George Bush finally catches the shuttle
bus from Crawford to Hell, how will history remember our
43rd president? As Our Dear Leader once so sagely said "There's
no such thing as legacies. At least, there is a legacy,
but I'll never see it."
As so often with those trademark quotes known as Bushisms,
he flits masterfully between Zen-like inscrutability and guy-drunk-on-gasoline
within the space of a single sentence. The bulk of Bush's legacy will almost
certainly be his vast back-catalogue of Bushisms that bend the English language
mercilessly into impossible shapes, confusing friend and enemy alike. There'd
be little else, after all, but a dead democracy and an angry world to remember
Maybe it's too early for obituaries, but let me be the first to list our Dear
Leader's glorious accomplishments (in no particular order) lest they be forgotten
post-mortem or pre-mid terms:
- 3,030 killed
on 9-11, government given "failing
grades" on following up 9-11 Commission recommendations
- 450 detainees
held at Guantanamo indefinitely without charge or due
billion all-time high US trade deficit (up 17.5%
in two years)
billion per-month cost of war in Iraq
- 2710 US
troops killed in Iraq, 1,550 Iraqi
civilians killed this month alone, and torture
now more widespread than during Saddam's dictatorship
- 750 constitutional
challenges contained in more than 130 Bush signing statements
as of 2006 (see: "It's
just a goddamned piece of paper!" - George Bush
on the constitution)
- 450 visits
to the White House claimed by Jack Abramoff - the crook
Bush 'barely knew' (see: "I
don't know him" - George Bush on Abramoff)
- 1,900 hurricane
Katrina death toll makes number five in top ten list
of deadliest US natural disasters, Bush
admits government response 'fell short' at 'all levels'
million Americans currently in prison, the world's
highest incarceration rate of 742
per 100,000 population (see: "They
hate us for our freedoms" - George Bush)
billion in tax cuts for the rich with 51.8% of
all tax cuts targeted to the top 1% by 2010 (see: "We
didn't play favorites in the tax code" - George
Bush on taxes)
million Americans currently without health insurance
health-care system is the envy of the world" -
million Americans living in poverty as of 2005,
up 5 million from 2000 (see: "[We will] reward
the effort and enterprise of working Americans" -
- 16% average
pay increases for top executives (2005-2006), 2% average
pay increases for corporate employees
are probably countless other reasons to remember the reign
of Bushco™. But, for some reason, I now feel extremely
depressed and angrier than Sally Struthers watching a competitive
eating contest. (Link to this)
MEETS DIRTY SANCHEZ
Sign of Impending Apocalypse?
teen TV star Dustin Diamond, who played Screech in 'Saved
By The Bell,' has released a 40
minute sex tape starring himself and two lucky ladies.
According to AOL's
TMZ.com, the cinematic masterpiece also includes a
Sanchez' scene. Agent David Hans Schmidt has acquired
the rights and is seeking a distributor for 'Saved By the
"Just when you think you have seen everything in this business, mankind
has raised the bar another notch. Or lowered it." said Schmidt (Link
PLAY 'BLAME CLINTON'
Whine Like Bitches When He Wins
the Arkansas Chug-A-Suck went semi-ballistic on Chris Wallace
the other day, the word 'combative' was parroted by outraged
talking heads all over the TV dial. "Gee, Clinton
got offended when he was blamed for 9-11? Must be guilty." Sound
reasoning. If you're an eight-year old.
In lieu of a Democrat reaction amounting to anything more than a snuffling "s'not
fair," Rudy Guiliani (yes, Rudy Guliani) came
to Clinton's aid: "The idea of trying to cast blame on President Clinton
is just wrong for many, many reasons." Said the slapheaded former emperor
But if you're looking for more intelligent, reasoned opinions on the 9-11 blame-game
bother looking in Roger Ailes' direction. Bush's chief propagandist accused
Clinton of 'wild overreaction' to Chris Wallace's passive aggressive slander
and went on "I frankly think the assault on Chris Wallace is an assault
on all journalists." Why should that bother Ailes? Maybe if the bloated
pig at the top of the Fox News shit heap employed any journalists, he might
have reason to squeal. (Link to this)
of Iraqis Want Bushco™ Out
to the Washington
Post: "A strong majority of Iraqis want U.S.-led
military forces to immediately withdraw from the country,
saying their swift departure would make Iraq more secure
and decrease sectarian violence, according to new polls
by the State Department and independent researchers."
It seems that Durr Fuehrer is even less popular in Iraq than here at home where,
according to the latest AP-Ipsos poll, only
60% of Americans wish he'd fuck off and stop invading our country. Maybe
if torture was rampant in the US and a 1,000-a-month were dying in a civil
war, we might get up to 65% too. Perhaps then we could envisage an end to sectarian
warfare and the establishment of a fledgling democracy. In Washington. (Link
GOT YOUR INTELLIGENCE ESTIMATE RIGHT HERE...
Intelligence Estimate Contradicts Bushco™
Dear Leader today took a glorious step forward in the name
of democracy today and declassified 10% of the War On Terror
assessment compiled by 14 US intel agencies back in April.
Why so generous? Because he wanted to back up his assertion
that the NY Times had been wrong in saying the war in Iraq
was breeding terrorists faster than Catholics on Ecstasy. "You
can read it for yourself, everybody can draw their own
conclusions about what the report says." Said Bush
in lieu of vindication. The portion of the
document selected to prove his point included the following:
we cannot measure the extent of the spread with precision,
a large body of all-source reporting indicates that activists
identifying themselves as jihadists, although a small
percentage of Muslims, are increasing in both number
and geographic dispersion."
that's from the part he did want you to
see. As the formerly funny Carlos
Mencia would say... (Link
BEN STEIN'S CONSCIENCE
Lieu Of News...
Stein wrote a column for the American Spectator entitled "Why
I am a Republican" in which he sang the praises
of Washington's most misunderstand fascistic greaseball.
Stein tells us that Karl Rove "is probably the most
humble human in a position of high authority I have ever
met." If only we really knew him, we wouldn't be hating
says Ferris Bueller's economics teacher. But, of course,
some people are just plain mean according to Stein and
would still hate him even they met him because "It’s
just who they are."
How I want to insult Ben Stein. But who's going to pick a fight with a guy
who was once Nixon's lawyer? And how could I doubt the judgment and veracity
of someone who once said "Oh, I don't think there was a Deep
Throat. That was a fake. I think there were several different sources and
some they just made up." (Link to this)
HUGH CORT, SEER OF ALL THINGS, HATH SPOKEN
Bozo Ramps Up Terror-phobia To Get Elected. Imagine That.
Republican presidential candidate Dr
Hugh Cort's Web site, Dr Hugh Cort describes himself
as "a kind and compassionate person with whom people
converse easily. His spiritual talent is the gift of encouragement." Others
may see him with a less angelic aura after reading his
disguised election pitch masquerading as a terror warning:
"Osama is soon going to attack with his 'American Hiroshima' plan where
he blows up 7 to 10 American cities with suitcase nukes...bin Laden has already
smuggled suitcase nukes through the Mexican border into the U.S. and is soon
going to blow up 7 to 10 American cities... he has gotten a fatwa, or religious
order, saying it is OK to kill 10 million Americans with nuclear weapons. Guess
what is going to happen next? So what can we do at this late date? God bless
you, and God bless America!"
That's some 'gift of encouragement' you have there Dr Hugh Cort. I feel very
encouraged to call you an asshole. Have these cocksuckers no
human decency off
switch? Now I wonder if Dr Hugh Cort is a frequent diner at Hawkins'
House of Yahweh, Abilene, TX... (Link to this)
CHARITY BUSHCO™ STYLE
Seeks To Introduce Compulsory AIDS Testing While Cutting
Support For Sufferers
HIV-1 virus: as warm and fuzzy as a Bush policy decision
number of people living with HIV/AIDS continues to rise,
but federal grants to pay for their care have not
risen since 2002. The Bush administration continues
to hold annual grants for the nation's metro areas at $600
million despite the fact that there are now more than a
million HIV positive Americans.
there is good news for the parasites who ride the Bushco™ shark
like cleaner fish: The government is planning "near
universal" compulsory AIDS testing to protect insurers
from unwittingly entering into intimate financial relationships
with those who may be HIV/AIDS infected.
At least the government is happy to throw some loose change at the insurance
companies, even if they're pleading poverty when it comes to helping those
who are suffering. Every time you think Bushco™ have hit rock bottom,
they always find a shovel. Jesus must be so proud. (Link
MANY DEAD IRANIANS DOES IT TAKE TO WIN A MID-TERM ELECTION?
On Iran Penciled In For October
precede elections with nauseating predictability like the
sick foreplay before a righteous fucking of democracy.
But According to Time Magazine, the rapists of reality
we know as Bushco™ are planning a
pre-mid-term strike on
America Iraq like it's
the newest idea out of the box. "You gotta vote for
us... there's a war on." Can't you hear the tired
lie echoed by a million Bushbots already? It's the electoral
equivalent of a mob protection racket and not too far from "vote
for us or we'll kill your kids." Only they're mostly
someone else's kids.
Because this imitation administration rides high on it's manic combination
of arrogance and pig-ignorance, it doesn't even try to disguise the old election-winning
gimmick. It's as if they don't care their plays are more familiar to us than
Paris Hilton's butt cleavage because we fall for it anyway. America admit it:
you've no grasp on reality apart from the spoon-fed chunks of malignant, xenophobic
offal you're fed by the powers that shouldn't be.
Imagine the Bushco™ husks of faux-humanity hunkered down wondering when
to launch an attack and how much damage to inflict to guarantee a GOP win in
November. There wouldn't even be a place in hell for these bastards. Satan,
after all, is the ultimate free marketeer and, as such, abhors competition.
(Link to this)
GODFATHER TO GRANT ONE MORE WISH
Rove Promises October Surprise
Karl Rove is telling 'Republican Insiders' he
has an October surprise planned to help Bush cling
to power. In the final two weeks before the elections the
Rove trick pony promises an advertising blitz, an army
of expenses-paid volunteers mobilized to key locations
to boost grass-roots efforts and 'monitor' the elections.
Meanwhile, Howie at the DNC plans to sit on his ass and
watch the last remaining shreds of American democracy flushed
down the totalitarian toilet.
What's Rove's surprise? A bin Laden look-alike blowing a rhesus monkey? A nuclear
singeing of Tehran? Gender realignment for Dick Cheney? Ronald Kessler, Newsmax
genius, had the same question but "Rove is not saying what the October
surprise will be." Guess that's why it's called a surprise, Newsmax. (Link
Jail Then Homelessness For Prisoner Who Planned to Co-habit
of some kind of Twighlight Zone constitutional loophole,
the state of Virginia still makes it a misdemeanor for
unmarried people to "lewdly and lasciviously associate" and
William Stanley had already served 11 years when he came up for parole when
he was turned down because he planned
to move in with a woman he wasn't married to. (Hick logic: You can't be
out there fornicating with unmarried women. You must stay in jail co-habiting
in a 6x8 with a sex-starved sweaty dude named Floyd instead. Makes complete
Stanley was eventually released and is now residing at the Union Mission, a
faith-based nonprofit group that provides shelter and counseling to the poor
and homeless. Hey West Virginia, y'all fucking retarded? (Link
Find Commonality With Islamofascists
left: Evangelical larvae freaking out at Jesus Camp; Jesus
Clothing for a Ken doll (Doll not included) for sale at Kids
In Ministry; A seminar by the 'Kids On Fire' people
(note: similarly ill-advised activity contained in name).
Becky Fischer's Bible camp in North Dakota, 'Kids
on Fire,' is the subject of a new documentary
entitled 'Jesus Camp.' The documentary shows kids speaking
in tongues, praying for an end to abortion and praying
for (or to?) a life-size poster of His Holiness, George
W. Bush. Some might call it salvation, others may opt for
In case anyone hasn't noticed the growing similarities between hardcore Evangelicals
in the US and the 'Islamofascists' in the Mid-East, Pastor Fischer is quick
to help. "I want to see them as radically laying down their lives for
the gospel as they are in Palestine, Pakistan and all those different places," she
said about her young charges. "Because, excuse me, we have the truth."
"We're kinda being trained to be warriors - only in a funner way." Said
one Evangelical larvae. See? We're not really so different after all. Brothers
and sisters, I have a dream...Perhaps, one day, bigots and extremists from all
four corners of the earth will be able to join hands together in hatred and fanaticism.
(Link to this)
weird, people weirder still
animals do weird things. Take for example the 16-year-old
Asian male elephant who surprised his trainer by learning
to speak Korean. According to The Seoul Times, the
elephant that goes by the name of Mr. Nose is able to pronounce
eight words including "Good," "Lie Down," "Not
Yet," Turn Around" and "No."
But sometimes humans do weird things to animals and I'm sure the sheep in our
next story wish they could have said "No." Sheriff's deputies recently
arrested a 69-year old man in Santa Barbara after he was found naked,
rolled in oats and coated in olive oil in a sheep pen. He was also carrying
a revolver and told the cops he was "enacting a fantasy." I am flabbergasted.
Who knew they keep sheep in Santa Barbara? (Link to
Come For The Waterboarding, Stay For The Homemade Cookies
was an interesting op-ed
in the New York Post about how much fun the detainees
are having at Gitmo on Bush-sponsored vacations of indefinite
length. Amidst all the accusations of torture, suicide,
wrongful imprisonment and ritual humiliation, it's easy
to get the wrong impression that Guantanamo is low on the
list of hot Caribbean destinations. How wrong you would
Thanks to Richard
Miniter (the master of delusion who penned 'Shadow of War - The Untold
Story of How Bush is Winning The War on Terror') we can know the truth at last:
Miniter did such a great job selling the place, I'm almost disappointed the
army aren't accepting reservations yet. "The politically correct regulations
are unbelievable," wails Miniter "detainees are entitled to a full
eight hours sleep and can't be woken up for interrogations." He fails,
however, to mention cocktails, conga lines or lap dances.
And there's more: "One interrogator actually bakes cookies for detainees,
while another serves them Subway or McDonald's sandwiches. Both are available
on base. (Filet o' Fish is an al Qaeda favorite.)" Those lucky bastards!
Miniter also froths that twenty two detainees even have "taxpayer-paid
prosthetic limbs." Whatever next? Taxpayer-paid lobster buffets?
So why on earth would the UN
would want to close down Gitmo? Is it just too much fun?
Or is it another example of whenever there's a good time to had, there's always
some buzzkill who wants to spoil it for everyone. Shame on you UN and thank
you Richard Miniter for telling it like it isn't. (Link
THIRD LAW OF RELIGIOUS INTOLERANCE
Anti-Muslim Comments Stir Usual Reactions
you thought the AP's Photoshopping of the Lebanon bombing
was clumsy? (Picture courtesy of Michelle
Malkin's playhouse of hate)
ugly boil of religious intolerance is being squeezed ferociously
these days and Newton's Third Law is most certainly in
effect: For every action there is a reaction, for every
lashing out there is a backlash. So for the Pope to casually
insult the world's second biggest religion in the course
of a day's pontificating and not expect repercussions is
But whenever anybody (whether Danish cartoonist or Hitler
Youth Pope) slams Islam, the onus always gets put on the Muslims to disown
those amongst their number who express their anger. The original cause of the
offense is never questioned by us because, goddammit, we're standing on the
moral high ground built from the rubble of 9-11 and we can say whatever we
want about the other 1.5 billion Muslims who didn't fly 757s
into our stuff.
For these reasons, it's hard to find a post-9-11 wingnut (or pre-9-11 wingnut
for that matter) who would see insulting Islam as uncool. Similarly, it would
be hard to find a wingnut who wouldn't demand fawning apologies from Muslims
every time those insults provoke the more demonstrative amongst them to return
the hatred with interest. Cultural fascists like Michelle Malkin would never
dream (at least not until after a few Chardonnays) of advocating the destruction
of Islam. But whenever the Malkins and O'Reillys and other assorted wingnut
clowns ignore offenses against Islam and move straight to demanding apologies
from the offended, they're demonstrating their idea of 'good Islam': a meek,
apologetic sub-religion that never challenges the God-given dominance of the
Judeo-Christian world view.
The cuntservative attitude to Islam resembles the condescending and hateful
attitude southern Democrats used to inflict on black people: We'll all get
along fine unless, God forbid, you should dare to challenge our self-awarded
superiority and our unquestionable right to treat you like shit. You get mad
'cos I call you boy? Better apologize to me... (You get mad 'cos I denigrate
your faith and call your prophet a proto-terrorist? Better apologize to me...)
Cuntservatives have always tolerated diversity just as long as the 'diverse'
remember who's in charge. It doesn't matter whether you're uppity negroes or
uppity Mullahs, remember who is boss and keep your caps (or turbans) permanently
doffed. Oh, and most importantly, shut up. (Link to this)
BOMBS AND GENIUS ROACHES
deciding those 1,500 pound bombs that blast the shit out
of everything and make your brain leak out of your ears
are a tad heavy-handed, the folks at the Air Force Research
Laboratory are figuring out new and more subtle ways of
combating enemy bunkers. So far they've come up with robot
bugs as the next generation of smart weapons.
These spooky little suckers are designed to be intelligent enough to conduct
missions autonomously with in-built abilities to improvise and think creatively.
One video at the Research Lab Web site shows a shows a six-legged
robot figuring out how to walk from scratch with no programming in eight
Stephen Thaler of Imagination Engines Inc., the man behind the genius robot
cockroaches, describes their tactical intelligence as "Machiavellian." However,
Thaler is right on the money when he also says "There is a reluctance
to entrust lethal missions to autonomous robots." You'd hope.
Anyone whose ever read a book on Artificial Intelligence (as I once tried to
do) will know that the whole idea is, literally, mind boggling in practice.
During every moment of our daily experience there are an infinite array of
possible actions and potential reactions that, somehow, our brains are able
to sift and plan around. How the hell could you expect a robot with only a
series of pre-programmed yes/no reactions (however complex) to emulate that? (Link
NEY BITES THE BIG ONE
to Plead Guilty on Bribe Charges
six-term Republican and carnival barker look-alike Bob
Ney vehemently denied being a crooked son-of-a-bitch for
was until today when he admitted accepting $170,000
worth of trips, meals, sports tickets and casino chips
while trying to win favors for a disgraced lobbyist. He's
expected to plead guilty and serve 27 months in jail. "I
have made serious mistakes and am sorry for them." Announced
Bob. Mistakes? Forgetting to tip is a mistake. Accepting
$170,000 worth of bribes is not a mistake, it's a fucking
As if to advance the commonly held thesis that the GOP has degenerated into
nothing more than a grab bag of chiseling weasels where getting caught is the
only crime, Dennis Hastert took the trouble to put
out a press release saying "My thoughts and prayers are especially
with him and his family at this time." How nice. (Link
Capture Illegal Aliens Working In Roswell
pseudo-debate about illegal immigration that drones on
like a dull roar in the background spawns many questions:
Considering every square inch of the United States has
been stolen at least three times over already, just who
are the illegals anyway? Just because one guy's ancestors
happened to be wearing pantaloons when they illegally entered
the place, does that make him legal? Doesn't calling Mexicans
'wetbacks' because they crossed a river sound a little
rich when your ancestors crossed 3,400 miles of ocean?
What fuckwit decided it was necessary to change INS to
the ridiculously dumb sounding ICE? How did I miss the
story below..? This is the best news item since the Osama/Whitney/Bobby
love triangle was exposed:
"Federal agents on Wednesday arrested 15 illegal aliens who were working
in Roswell, New Mexico, for a local company under contract to paint US military
(Link to this)
Labels Bushco™ Report on Iran's Nuclear Capabilities "Outrageous
nuclear capabilities: a barrel marked 'radioactive' and
the crack team assembled to hurl it in the direction of
letter sent to the congressional committee by the UN
inspectors investigating Iran's nuclear program has
contradicted a US report on Iran's nuclear capabilities.
The report "contains erroneous, misleading and unsubstantiated
information," according to the International Atomic
Energy Agency who called US attempts to exaggerate Iran's
nuclear capabilities "outrageous and dishonest."
It's almost as if we're re-living the run-up to the invasion of Iraq. But Bushco™ won't
care that their modus operandi is more obvious than a pulp thriller plot. Do
you think the PNAC nutjobs give a monkey's scrotum about reality and/or public
consent? How sweet. (Link to this)
ON: POPE GETS GNARLY ON ISLAM
Mohammed Mad Again
Pope caused outrage amongst in the Muslim world by
quoting criticisms of the Prophet Mohammed by a 14th
Century Byzantine Christian emperor, Manuel II. "Show
me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there
you will find things only evil and inhuman, such as his
command to spread by the sword the faith he preached," Said
Hakem al-Mutairi, secretary general of Kuwait's Islamic National party, urged
Muslim countries to recall their ambassadors from the Vatican until the pope
apologized. The Pakistani foreign ministry said Benedict's remarks were "regrettable."
Perhaps it's time the Catholics and Muslims got together and agreed that the
Crusaders, Conquistadors, wartime Hitler appeasers and latterday kiddy-fiddlers
are not great ambassadors for Catholicism - just as those hirsute psychos who
park airliners in skyscrapers aren't exactly glowing examples of Islamic piety.
I'm probably not alone in wishing that the hypocrites and loud mouths on both
sides of the religious divide would just shut the fuck up and do all of us
a big favor. (Link to this)
OLD SAME OLD
is still excited... is anyone else?
- Less than two months until Election Day, the latest NBC
News/Wall Street Journal poll finds that more than half
of registered voters disapprove of President Bush's job
performance, even more disagree with his handling of Iraq
and a strong plurality prefer a Congress controlled by
the Democrats — all suggesting that Democrats are
still poised to pick up seats in the upcoming midterms." (story)
right. We're all talked-out, thought-out and not giving
a shit any more. And that seems to include the Democrats.
The battle to retake
Stalingrad the House still
looks like it's going to resemble a fight to the death
between Barney the Dinosaur and Godzilla - even with a
gift opponent like Bush who can't seem to go a day without
fucking up before lunch. The Dems are like caretaker candidates
headed by a small-thinking dufus (sorry, Howard, liked
you man, but you let me down...) who's taken to rambling
on about the 1960s like some kind of cuntservative
caricature of a liberal.
The only real difference at this point is that the Dems get mad about government
disagreeing with the wishes of the people, while the Reps get mad at the people
who disagree with the wishes of the government. That's it. If you're looking
for vision, commitment and idealism, you're sure as hell in the wrong place
at the wrong time. (Link to this)
DOCTOR RUTH OF JEEZUZLAND
sexmeister promotes better tasting jizz
Joe Beam runs a group in Tennessee called "Family
Dynamics." Their message: Christians ought to be
having hotter sex. Beam recently
held forth at the San Diego Church of Christ on the
subject. At one point, he explained to the audience how
to make their semen taste better for the benefit of their
spouses. "Sweet stuff works." According to
Joe. And it provides a built-in excuse because "then
you can say, 'I'm eating this cake for you, baby!'"
I didn't even know Jeezuzlanders did BJs. Even less that they appear to have
settled the 'spit or swallow' debate. I now see Laura
Bush in a whole new light... and my lunch. (Link
BROTHER AT LOW, LOW PRICES
stores increase use of tracking chips
the spy in your pants
has announced plans to increase the number of stores
using Radio Frequency Identification (RFID) chips to
more than a thousand. RFID chips are embedded in merchandise
to help with "inventory control and supply chain
management." But the chips stay embedded after purchase
which raises the weird possibility of them being used
to track customers too if a retailer (or friendly government
agency) felt like it.
WalMart and Target are two of the biggest fans of RFID, which has evolved over
the past four years from conspiracy fodder to standard practice without much
fuss. It's almost as if nobody cares that those $5 dollar pants you bought
at Sam's Club are now endowed with surveillance superpowers or that your kid's
Sponge Bob backpack is beaming your whereabouts back to the mother ship in
Bentonville 24 hours a day.
It's now two years since the FDA approved an implantable, rice-grain-sized
RFID chip for use in people . Let's read that again in bold just in case
you didn't find the implications sufficiently disturbing: It's now
two years since the FDA approved an implantable, rice-grain-sized RFID chip
for use in people. VeriChip, the maker of the implantable chip, admit
that even their own research found that 9 out of 10 people find the whole thing
creepy. Can I get a "well, duh"? (Link
study partly funded by The
Multidisciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies has
recommended researching the effect of LSD and psilocybin
on headaches. I like their style though, sadly, The Multidisciplinary
Association for Psychedelic Studies is not half as much
fun as it sounds. (Link to
LOOK NOW... IT'S THE MASTER RACE!
Wire conservative op-ed
won't say too much. Careless talk costs lives and there's
a war on with... err... somebody and I live in fear of
being man-raped by gay terrorists... It was the French
who were behind the 9-11 attacks and John Kerry who lost
WWII... It is my right under the constitution to bomb abortion
clinics because we need the drones. Islam? I Slam! Go Dubya!
(Link to this)
AM CRUSHING YOUR HEAD...
that "I am crushing your head" guy off The Kids
in The Hall? Saddam Hussein clearly does.
We all know that the former despot and husky
underpants model hates frootloops but likes Raisin Bran Crunch. But who
knew he ran the full gamut of North American culture and was also a fan of
camp Canadian comedy? After a particularly uncomfortable court session with
a Kurdish Saddam survivor (reunions with folks whose families you gassed are
always awkward), a pissed-off Saddam yelled at the prosecution bench "You
are agents of Iran and Zionism. We will crush your heads." Cue the "I
am pinching your face" Kurdish guy?
[Iran and Zionism? I think the part of my brain that processes
conspiracy theories just had a mini-stroke.] (Link
FOR CIVILIZATION? CALL IT NOVEMBER
best that can be said in defense of Bush is that 2,819
people died on 9-11 because we unwisely entrusted a stumblefuck
moron and a gang of vicious ideologues with the delicate
task of keeping the world's most powerful nation safe.
The worst is that America's catastrophe provided Bush his
Since 9-11, his roach-like survival skills have relied almost entirely on a
unique ability to convert his own shit into nourishment. Whether it's 9-11
or the subsequent horrors of Iraq, Afghanistan or New Orleans, he just channels
each new disaster into votes with that familiar necrophiliac grin sat squarely
on his face.
Key to the process is fear. Or more accurately "terrorphobia", the
artificial substitute for rational discourse. Now, with mid-terms looming,
Bush is selling himself as the antidote to the "terrorphobia" he's
hooked us on. Truly, this kind of iron-balled duplicity would have made even
Machiavelli choke on his own vomit.
Bush has used 9-11 as the supreme excuse to create a nation in his own image:
a system purged of all egalitarian and humanist intent, a society drained of
hope and prosperity for the majority and a vision of the future with nothing
to offer but fear. Because of this we are all victims of 9-11.
(Link to this)
IT'S THEM PESKY ILLUMINATISTS AGAIN
9-11 with the conspiracy theorists
global conspiracy to create a new world order under Illuminati
mind control will prevail... just as soon as I'm done poopin'."
9-11 on the mind, it was illuminating (pun intended) to
skim through the conspiracy nut sites and find out that
the whole 9-11 deal was just part of that extremely slow-burning
Illuminati plot to take over the world. How do we know?
Because the number 11 is their (not-so) secret mind control
number. And so 11-based coincidences abound:
York City has 11 letters
has 11 letters
W Bush has 11 letters
Center has 11 letters
York is the 11th state
first plane to hit the Twin Towers was flight number
11 was carrying 92 passengers. 9 + 2 = 11
77 was carrying 65 passengers. 6 + 5 = 11
= 9 + 1 + 1 = 11
Madrid bombings happened 911 days after 9-11
occurred 11 years to the day after George Bush Sr. made
his infamous New World Order speech
it is written that a son of Arabia would awaken a fearsome
Eagle" appears in verse 9.11 of the Quran
groundbreaking ceremony for the construction of the Pentagon
took place on September 11, 1941
Airlines Flight 11 was the first commercial airliner
to be blown up by a bomb in 1962
1974, a six-floor fire started on the 11th floor of the
north tower of the World Trade Center
11, 1998 - 'The Starr Report' is presented to Congress
accusing President Bill Clinton of 11 impeachable offenses
birth is celebrated on the 11th day of the 9th month
September 11th there are 111 days left to the end of
11th is the 254th day of the year: 2
+ 5 + 4 = 11
Island was discovered on September 11, 1609 by Henry
spookier still, no-one seems to have noticed that the WTC
was shaped like a fucking huge number 11 itself. You're
welcome, conspiracy dudes. (Link
PASSENGERS SUE OVER BONNIE TYLER 'TRAUMA'
Eclipse of The Heart" performance leads to lawsuit
France passengers are suing the airline after
80s two-packs-a-day-voiced siren Bonnie Tyler was asked
to sing for the cabin crew. The passengers reportedly
claimed they were "traumatized" by the experience.
What would you rather hear at 40,000 feet: (a) an impromptu Bonnie Tyler performance?
(b) hearty yells of "Allahu Akbar" emanating from economy class?
Hmm... not an easy decision. (Link to
PROTOCOLS OF THE FLUFFERS OF ZION
qualifiers: (i) To question the policies and
actions of the government of Israel does not constitute
anti-semitism. (ii) The Holocaust most certainly happened
and it was a very, very bad trip. (iii) The Protocols
of The Elders of Zion was a Czarist propaganda hoax based
on an 19th century anti-Masonic tract (please tell David
Icke). (iv) Peace will never exist in the Mid-East until
the lunatic fringes who mistake religious dogma for policy
put their toys away and start dabbling in pragmatism.
notice how we free-speech-lovers in the US have imposed
a voluntary embargo on criticizing Israel? Ever wonder
why we're so eager to denounce anyone who tries to as an
anti-semite? And God forbid you should ever wonder whether
the hardline model for an exclusively Jewish state inline
with Old Testament prophesy is a fair or rational proposition
in today's pluralistic world. (Who the hell are you, Mel
We were treated to a perfect example of the 'Israel-is-always-right' phenomenon
on, of all things, last night's Real
Time With Bill Maher. HBO's favorite Bush botherer invited Binyamin Netanyahu
in for a chat/ass valeting session. On a left-leaning show with a predominantly
left-leaning studio audience hosted by a left-leaning guy who was fired
by ABC for not toeing the wing nut line on 9-11, you might have assumed
the former Prime Minister of Israel would be in for some tough questions. But
you would have been horribly wrong.
From the onset, the interview began with the usual MSM premise: Israel = good,
[insert Arab/Persian state here] = bad as Maher gave Netanyahu an open mic
to let fly with his best material. Employing the familiar Zionist mix of sentimentality,
guilt inducement and uncompromising nationalism, Netanyahu proceeded to tell
us that "we have America" and "we will not go back into the
gas chambers" to much applause from the studio audience. Stirring stuff.
Maher also gave his interviewer a free pass when he equated Hitler's Blitz
on London with Hizbullah's attacks on Israel (WWII
analogies are very 'in' this season). So let's not mention, as Bill certainly
didn't, that the Blitz killed 43,000 people and destroyed more than a million
homes in less than a year while, according to the Israeli
Ministry of Foreign Affairs, a grand total of six Israeli civilians were
killed by Hizbullah attacks between May 2000 and the start of the attack on
Lebanon in July. Call me a liberal
moral relativist, but 43,000 to 6 ratios don't really fall into my big
list of things that are really similar.
As a firm believer in rejecting absolutist dogma from whichever side of the
political or religious spectrum it is shrieked, Netanyahu's speech sits uneasily
on my stomach like bad gefilte fish. Just who is it who wants to reopen Auschwitz
for business anyway? And what the fuck is "we have America" supposed
to mean? Stuff like this only serves to make Israel sound like the Mid-East
brat of big mommy America stamping its foot and crying 'Holocaust' any time
it doesn't get it's own way. So, go on then, out me as an anti-semite. (Link
SPITTING WORM NOT A EUPHEMISM
seek endangered status for weird earthworm
Earthworm advocate Steve Paulson said "This worm is
the stuff that legends and fairy tales are made of. What
kid wouldn't want to play with a 3 foot-long, lily smelling,
soft pink worm that spits?" (Note to self: no more
bong hits before press conferences.)
Conservationists are asking the federal government to protect the Giant Palouse
Earthworm under the Endangered Species Act. The worm, previously thought to
be extinct, has been rediscovered recently in parts of Idaho and Washington
state. (Link to this)
OF THE DAY
wife pornstars, Heavy Metal pedophiles, Mexican decapitators,
blind drivers... it's a big world out there
the First Amendment of the Constitution of the United
States, and adjudicated by the Supreme Court of the United
States on many occasions, pornography is a right under
the First Amendment and no laws have been broken. As
Mayor and council of the city of Snyder, we do not endorse
pornography; however, we do endorse an individual's rights
under the First Amendment of freedom and expression."
of Snyder, Oklahoma, answering calls that Police Chief
Tod Ozmun should be fired because his wife does Internet
was suffering from a delusion that he was Ozzy Osbourne
and had to do what Ozzy Osbourne was believed to have
done and have sex with a 13-year-old girl."
for Arthur Fairwell, accused Australian child molester.
men dressed in black stormed into a bar, fired into the
air and threw down five heads."
spokeswoman for the Michoacan state prosecutor's office
gives a heads-up after Mexican gangsters gave someone a
not-too subtle message. (story)
asked him if he could see me. He removed the dark-colored
sunglasses he was wearing and I could clearly see he
was blind as he had no eyes."
English cop describes in court what happened when he pulled
a car over for dangerous driving. (story)
(Link to this)
NEWS FOR BUSH, GOOD NEWS FOR BURKA SALESMEN
control half of Afghanistan, Iraq in 'civil war-like
on terror going great? According to the
Senlis Council, an international security and drugs
Taliban have psychological and military control over half
the country. Surely only a liberal, terrorist sympathizer
would dare to wonder why Bushco™ are pouring American
lives and money down the toilet and achieving so little.
And don't even mention that pesky war going on round the
While the neocons continue to deny that Iraq is in a state of civil war, Condoleeza
Rice has found the perfect way to reinforce that message: compare the war
in Iraq to the American Civil War. Smart move. (Link
WIRE EXCLUSIVE: SNEAK PEAK AT NEW TMX ELMO!
Closely Guarded Secret in Plush Toys to be Revealed September
of course, stands for 'turd-munching xenophobe.' (right).
Wow. Excitement mounts as the holiday season approaches. Check out this (not
taking it too seriously are we?) press
release from Fisher Price:
"NEW YORK--(BUSINESS WIRE)--Sept. 6, 2006--The kick-off to the holiday shopping
season officially begins on September 19th, when the Fisher-Price™ Friends
division of Fisher-Price, Inc., a subsidiary of Mattel, Inc. (NYSE: MAT), reveals
the most closely guarded secret in the history of plush toys. On the tenth anniversary
of Tickle Me Elmo, the all new T.M.X.™ ELMO will make its global debut.
With presales already running strong at major retailers - sight unseen - the
new T.M.X. Elmo hits store shelves for the first time at 9 a.m. on the morning
of September 19th in the United States and globally on the 20th. Online Elmo
bloggers are already talking about setting up camp at stores to be among the
first to take home the newest sensation featuring Sesame Street's lovable red
monster." (Link to this)
Harris wins GOP nomination
Katherine Harris campaign juggernaut (left): She's harder
to shift than an infestation of roaches with a rat chaser
If proof were needed that the system is terminally fucked, you could do worse
than take a look at Florida - that sunshine version of Boss Tweed's Tammany
Hall. How was it possible that a cuntservative pariah like Katherine Harris
- scorned by her own party, submerged in sleaze and still stinking of her 2000
shenanigans - could win nomination? (story)
The GOP tried to talk her out of running, she ran a pathetic campaign featuring rallies
with no supporters and a Web site with no hits, her fundraising activities
has been linked to GOP corruption, her staff deserted her, and... she still
Some stories present this as a 'plucky underdog overcoming insurmountable odds,'
More realistically, it should be presented as a symptom of the gutless and
morally vacuous state of American politics which has, in its turn, whelped
a gutless and morally vacuous electorate who couldn't vote their way out of
a wet paper bag. (Link to this)
BROWN: VIETNAM FLASHBACK ALERT!
fired at chopper full of dignitaries in Georgia
for a glimpse into the dark, empty mind of American cuntservatism,
Fried Wire is now checking the news at The Conservative
Voice - and it's as loud, shrill and obnoxious as you'd
expect from its name. Today's tidbit:
McCain Helicopter Draws Missile Fire
By Sher Zieve –- A spokesman for the nation of Georgia said this week
that the helicopter of an American delegation to that country was fired upon,
last week. Senator John McCain (R-AZ) was named as the leader of the group.
A surface-to-air missile is said to have been fired at the helicopter carrying
McCain. The missile missed its mark and no injuries were reported.
Interestingly, The Conservative Voice omits
some important and informative details. In addition to McCain, the delegation
also included Senators Saxby Chambliss, Lindsey Graham, Mel Martinez, Richard
Burr, John Sununu, and, last but not least, Georgian President Mikhail Saakashvili.
I can't help thinking that the president of Georgia would have been a more
likely target for Georgian rebels than a clapped-out sleazeball from Arizona.
It doesn't always have to be about us, Goddamit. Despite the best efforts of
the Bush administration, there are still some people in the world who don't
necessarily want to kill Americans. (Link to
DEF SEC RECALLED FOR REPAIRS
during an official visit to Japan as Gerald Ford's Chief
of Staff in 1974. (And, yes, this post is just a cheap
excuse to use this picture.)
light went on recently causing him to be brought in
for repairs. He underwent shoulder surgery Tuesday to repair
a torn rotator cuff, officials said. A 'torn rotator cuff'?
Sounds more like something that would happen to a '74 Camaro
to me. So, for the benefit of others for whom anatomy is
a blank, here is too
"The rotator cuff is a group of four muscles that surround the humeral head.
The muscles are referred to as the "SITS" muscles-Supraspinatus, Infraspinatus,
Teres minor and Subcapularis."
Got it? (Link to this)
PHONY WAR ON FAKE TERROR
Pet Products say "Let your dog get even with this
evil bastard" and buy
a bin Laden chewtoy.
Watson, internet investigator (horrible phrase) doubts
the authenticity of the Gadahn tape. He cites its poor
quality and convenient timing for Bush (can anyone say
mid-terms?) as suspiciously piscine. Watson has taken to
referring to those al Qaeda tapes that always seem to pop
up in time to get Bush out of hot water as "The Neocons
Greatest Hits." Here are some golden oldies:
prefer their earlier stuff... The last time
a bin Laden solo tape emerged was during the furore
surrounding illegal NSA wiretapping of US citizens
in January. The
BBC commented that "the commander-in-chief
has been under intense pressure in recent weeks, accused
of trampling on civil liberties in pursuit of terror
suspects. His defense has been that America is a nation
at war. So bin Laden's latest threats to launch new
attacks on the US will only serve to underline this
difficult third album... A
bin Laden vid appeared in October 2004 - exactly
three days before the election and caused Bush's approval
rating to jump six points.
Laden unplugged... Prior to the start of the
Iraq war, bin
Laden appeared in February 2003 on an audio tape
that was touted as proof positive of Al Qaeda links
to Saddam Hussein - the tape was later determined to
be a fake.
bin Laden debut album... In December 2001, a
mistranslated bin Laden tape surfaced in Afghanistan
featuring a poor quality look-alike who got the 9-11
hijackers names wrong. He also wore rings which are
a major no no for strict Muslims.
doubt the black ops propaganda delicately spoon-fed to
us by our obliging media, ineveitably invites a spray of
venom from stage right. I'm sure, to the Bushco™ brownshirts,
Steve Watson is seen as a terrorist-sympathizing traitor
for doubting The Dear Leader.
Has everyone forgotten this country was founded through revolution and defined
by its healthy contempt for 'God-given' authority? When did we turn into a
nation of paranoid sheep with a kink for authoritarianism? Sure as hell wasn't
that way ten years ago when the wingnut hypocrites were busy shredding Bill
Clinton into Bubba-based mystery meat. (Link
THE FUCK UP
to an unnamed GOP
spokesperson quoted at The Hill "We're under no
illusions that the House floor in September is not going
to be political theater, we're showing that the Democrats
are weak on national security and want to spend your money."
If that's the GOP strategy for maintaining control of the House, are they in
trouble. How many 9-11s have happened on the Democrats watch? How many $8.5
trillion national debts were run-up by Democrats? Here's a simple counter to
the GOP talking points: shut the fuck up. (Link
WAR ON FAKE TERROR?
the neocon v. islamofascist war on terror drags on in its
own Orwellian way, imagine how delighted Bushco™ must
have been when former Californian heavy metal dude turned
al Qaeda terrorist Adam
Gadahn made a video. Gadahn, complete with terror beard
and robe, is now one of the most high-profile of al Qaeda's
western recruits. On the vid (not really a 'booty, booty,
booty, booty, rockin' everywhere' type of production),
he ranted about the infidel, Bush, Iraq, yada, yada...
all the usual fear-inducing islamofascist propaganda that
works far more to Bush's advantage than anyone else's.
But the most interesting part of his fireside terror chat was his list of three
favorite infidels who, coincidentally, could well be Bushco's three least-favorite
infidels: Seymour Hersh, George Galloway and Robert Fisk. Hmm... witty speech
writing, CIA dudes.
And, speaking of the nagging paranoia that al Qaeda does not really exist other
than as a Mephistophelian invention of American intelligence, it was strange
to see that 'Jihad Unspun,' the english language al Qaeda-backed site, is still
up and running (Google it yourself). Back in 2003, folks of a suspicious bent
were wondering why a pro-al Qaeda Web site operating out of Canada (not exactly
the hostile ass-end of Pakistan) was not, oh I don't know, closed the fuck
down. One logical conclusion was that 'Jihad Unspun' was really a clumsy entrapment
project to snare terror-curious surfers and spread disinformation. That was
a pretty convincing argument three years ago and even more so today. (For the full
story on Jihad Unspun, check the Information Clearing House) (Link
AMERICA READY FOR A FEMALE ANTICHRIST?
I admit it... When you get news from a site that
has sidebar links listing "Ufology, Plagues, False
Gods, Freebies," you may have wandered far from Reuters
territory. But then what does Reuters know about the coming
of the antichrist?
Since the dawn of recorded imbecility, good Christians (or more accurately,
bad ones) have been speculating over the identity of Jesus's own Lex Luthor
and taking that AD 90s potboiler by John of Patmos as, err, gospel.
So who is it? The candidates range from Genghis
Khan to Uncle
Joe Stalin, from Napoleon to Adolf
Hitler, from the Pope to Matthew
Lesko. But now the true identity of the evil one can be revealed. According
News, it's none other than Hillary Clinton. Wow. Is America ready for a
Apparently, Clinton blew her cover when she voiced support for the creepy national
ID card scheme currently under consideration by the Washington Soviet. If you're
not totally convinced that's damning evidence, Raiders News helpfully points
out the obvious, logical implications: "Without this future ID, nobody
will "buy or sell, save he that has the mark, or the name of the beast,
or the number of his name" according to Revelation 13:17." Yikes.
It's horribly easy to imagine Jeezuzland falling for the 'Clinton-is-the-antichrist'
talking point if she does run for Prez. But at least 'antichrist' sounds way
cooler than 'flip-flopper.'
(Link to this)
IN LOW PLACES
Mafia controling lawmakers via bribes
pushers: John Breaux and Bill Frist never met a bribe they
shouldn't really be a surprise that congressional bribees
have shoveled in over half a million dollars from the Pharm
Mafia since 2000. A
new report by The Center for Public Integrity found
325 trips taken by lawmakers and aides at an average cost
of $1,900 per trip. Most of those lawmakers who accepted
these trips also voted for the Medicare Prescription Drug
Act, which led to soaring profits for... guess who?
It shouldn't really be a surprise either that former Democratic Senator John
Breaux was one of the biggest takers. He was one of only two Democrats allowed
to participate in the Republican-controlled negotiations during which the 2003
prescription drug bill was drafted. A 2003 study by Boston University researchers
found that 61 percent of Medicare money spent on prescription drugs would become
profit for the pharmaceutical companies thanks to the best efforts of Breaux,
Frist, et al.
So tell me again why I should care which brand of amoral slime wrests control
of the policymaking rat's nest in November? (Link
HUNTER IRONICALLY KILLED BY FISH
Irwin dead, Wikipedia page subject to post-mortem harassment
15 years spent fucking with dangerous wildlife as 'The
Crocodile Hunter,' Steve Irwin, the scourge of haptephobic
reptiles everywhere, has finally met his match. Irwin
was killed by a stingray while swimming off the coast
of Queensland on Sunday.
Not everyone was saddened by the demise of the Crocodile Hunter. Within minutes
of the news, a hater had added "Steve
Irwin's dead! LOLOLOLOLOL!" to his Wikipedia entry which administrators
were obliged to remove. Who could have been so callous as to slam a dead guy?
Probably Jeff Corwin. (Link to this)
stagnant or booming? Make your own mind up 'cos no-one
else seems to be able to...
Sept. 1 /U.S. Newswire/ -- House Speaker J. Dennis Hastert
(R-Ill.) today issued
the following statement today:
in time for the Labor Day weekend there is great news
that more American families will be coming home from
work feeling optimistic with money in their wallets to
spend. This is a strong sign that our economy is continuing
to grow at a healthy pace. These new jobs are proof positive
that House Republicans' policies of tax relief and fiscal
responsibility are helping businesses to hire new workers
providing American families with job security. Unfortunately,
the Democrats continue to 'labor away', trying to destroy
jobs with higher taxes and sky rocketing spending."
Sept. 1 /U.S. Newswire/ -- House Democratic Leader Nancy
the following statement today:
disappointing jobs report proves President Bush and the
Republicans are out of touch with Americans who are living
paycheck to paycheck and are struggling to make ends
meet. First, we had a so-called 'recovery' without jobs;now
we have a 'recovery' without wage increases. And yet
President Bush continues to assert that 'Things are good
for American workers. Just 128,000 jobs were created
in August, less than the number needed just to keep pace
with the growing labor force. Another 11,000 manufacturing
jobs lost. With today's lackluster jobs report, President
Bush still has the worst job creation record of any President
since the Great Depression."
get the feeling you're being no so subtley manipulated?
(Link to this)
AND RICK AND THE ART OF SELF-PRESERVATION
exposed by bloggers; Santorum sets up straw man Green
Stevens and Rick Santorum: self-serving dickheads ruthlessly
butt-fucking the political process and ejaculating into
the faces of the electorate (see: democracy).
vacuity is not the exclusive domain of Republican pols.
But, by golly (as Donald Rumsfeld would say), they seem
to have made it an art form all their own. Take Ted 'King
of Pork' Stevens who still seems to be sulking
about having his pretty new bridge taken away from
him. When Tom Coburn (R-OK) and Barack Obama (D-IL) sponsored
a bill to make federal grants and contracts open to public
scrutiny through a searchable database, an anonymous senator
single-handedly blocked it's passage. It wasn't until bloggers
launched a concerted campaign to out the one-man veto that Stevens
'fessed up. Oh my... never saw that coming. Could the
reason Stevens chose anonymity be that even he was embarrassed
to put his name to such a transparently self-serving piece
Take also Rick Santorum. Not only is Santorum the most flamboyantly dumb motherfucker
ever to hold public office this side of Retardo-world, he's also one of the
most self-serving. How else could we explain the Pennsylvania GOP expending
so much time and energy getting
a Green Party candidate signed up to run in November's elections? It certainly
doesn't take a PHD in political science to figure that Santorum's votes are
unlikely to be impacted by a Green minnow - a different story for his Dem challenger
who is currently only
six points ahead of the eponymous by-product
of anal sex. Republicans: gotta love 'em... or they'll just force you to
anyway. (Link to this)
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