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SADDAM TO MAKE COMEBACK?
July 17, 2005 (BAGHDAD, Iraq)

Many ordinary Iraqis remain suspicious that the failure to bring Saddam to justice leaves open the possibility that the insurgency will win, and that his regime will be restored. "There are a lot of people who think Saddam will come back," said Ali Kadhim, who runs the Teeba Supermarket in Baghdad's Saidiyah district and who said he was eager to see the trial begin. One of his customers, overhearing the conversation, insisted that life for ordinary Iraqis was better under Hussein's rule.

"I wish that Saddam would come back," said Omar Qassim, a cell phone company employee, who was shopping for groceries in the store. "Under Saddam we only saw car bombs on the television. "I have no love for Saddam, but there are people in charge now who are worse than Saddam, and we have no security and no services," he added.

Kadhim conceded that he had a point about the electricity. "I don't want Saddam to come back, but frankly, the services under Saddam were great," he said. (Chicago Tribune)

THE LITTLE LEAGUE ENFORCER TAKES NO PRISONERS
July 15, 2005 (PITTSBURGH, Pennsylvania)

A T-ball coach allegedly paid one of his players $25 to hurt an 8-year-old mentally disabled teammate so he wouldn't have to put the boy in the game, police said Friday. Mark R. Downs Jr., 27, of Dunbar, is accused of offering one of his players the money to hit the boy in the head with a baseball, police said. Witnesses told police Downs didn't want the boy to play in the game because of his disability. The boy was hit in the head and in the groin with a baseball just before a game, and did not play. "The coach was very competitive," state police Trooper Thomas B. Broadwater said. "He wanted to win." (Associated Press)

GOVERNOR QUITS MUSCLE MAG MOONLIGHTING
July 15, 2005 (SACRAMENTO, California)

Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger announced Friday he was quitting his job as the executive editor of two body building magazines amid a storm of criticism about his lucrative moonlighting. Schwarzenegger said he will relinquish his title as executive editor of Muscle & Fitness and Flex magazines and give up the multimillion dollar salary that went with it. (San Francisco Chronicle) [See? That was easy. Now, if we could just get Rove to come clean about that spying thing...] Previous story

FOX FEAR MACHINE AT FULL THROTTLE
July 15, 2005 (FREAKIN' ANYWHERE)

In a terrifying, but totally uninformative online item, F(oxymoron) News seeks to whip up public paranoia into a froth with counterterrorism expert Juval Aviv:

"I predict, based primarily on information that is floating in Europe and the Middle East, that an event is imminent and around the corner here in the United States. It could happen as soon as tomorrow, or it could happen in the next few months... If your gut feeling tells you when you walk onto a bus there is something unusual or suspicious, get out and walk away. You may do it 10 times for no reason, but there will be one time that saves your life. Let your sixth sense direct you." (FoxNews.com)

INTERROGATORS GONE WILD
July 14, 2005 (CLUB MED GUANTANAMO, Cuba)

Military report cites humiliation of U.S. prisoners

The report said Mohamed al-Qahtani--labeled by U.S. officials as the "20th hijacker"--was forced to stand naked before a woman interrogator for at least five minutes and was made to wear thong underwear on his head and a bra.

Qahtani also was told by interrogators that "his mother and sister were whores," according to the report, and he was led by a dog leash attached to his hand chains and made to do a "series of dog tricks" as part of the interrogation. (ChicagoTribune.com)

Really, how kinky are the interrogators they are training these days?

SPECIAL INTERESTS/SPECIAL ED
July 13, 2005 (SACRAMENTO, California)

With a bill pending, Schwarzenegger backs the dietary supplement industry.

Deepening his personal involvement in an industry that has business pending at the Capitol, Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger earlier this year helped dietary supplement companies launch a lobbying group.

An article in the August 2005 edition of Muscle & Fitness magazine, for which Schwarzenegger serves as executive editor, recounts his attendance at a March 15 meeting at which the lobbying group formed and says the governor remains "a phone call away" from the organization. (Sacramento Bee)

[So like a true Republican debutante, Schw... (I can't even be bothered to type his stupid long-ass name) publicly blossoms into a fully fledged hypocrite. Isn't that sweet?]

NATIONAL GUARD CRITICIZED FOR ANTI-ISLAM POSTER
July 12, 2005 (SACRAMENTO, California)

Islamic leaders and peace groups are criticizing the California National Guard for a flier posted in its headquarters suggesting the United States should execute Islamic terrorists with bullets dipped in pig's blood to deny them entry to heaven.

The poster attributes the practice to World War I General John J. Pershing. "Maybe it is time for this segment of history to repeat itself, maybe in Iraq?" the flier stated. It was posted outside a cubicle in the Guard's Civil Support Division.

A second flier showed the wings and tail of a bomber forming a peace sign with the slogan, "Peace the old fashioned way." (San Francisco Chronicle)

PUTTING THE 'CUNT' IN 'THE GAMES DO COUNT'
July 11, 2005 (FOX NEWS, Disgrace)

The following exchange between F(oxymoron) News host Brian Kilmeade and F(oxymoron) News business contributor and substitute host Stuart Varney occurred during breaking news coverage of the attacks on London subways and buses on the July 7 edition of Fox News' Fox & Friends:

KILMEADE: And that was the first time since 9-11 when they should know, and they do know now, that terrorism should be Number 1. But it's important for them all to be together. I think that works to our advantage, in the Western world's advantage, for people to experience something like this together, just 500 miles from where the attacks have happened.

VARNEY: It puts the Number 1 issue right back on the front burner right at the point where all these world leaders are meeting. It takes global warming off the front burner. It takes African aid off the front burner. It sticks terrorism and the fight on the war on terror, right up front all over again.

KILMEADE: Yeah.

QUESTION: Does the president continue to have confidence in Mr. Rove?

MCCLELLAN: Again, these are all questions coming up in the context of an ongoing criminal investigation. And you've heard my response on this.

QUESTION: So you're not going to respond as to whether or not the president has confidence in his deputy chief of staff?

MCCLELLAN: You're asking this question in the context of an ongoing investigation, and I would not read anything into it other then I'm simply going to comment on an ongoing investigation.

QUESTION: Has there been any change, or is there a plan for Mr. Rove's portfolio to be altered in any way?

MCCLELLAN: Again, you have my response to these questions.

(complete transcript at rawstory.com)

TRUTH AT LAST?
July 10, 2005 (WASHINGTON, DC)

Karl Rove, President George W. Bush's top political adviser, was the secret source who gave a Time magazine reporter permission to testify last week, thus avoiding jail for contempt of court, Newsweek reported on Sunday. Mr Rove has been the subject of growing speculation as two journalists faced prison for failing to reveal their sources to a federal prosecutor investigating the leak of the identity of Valerie Plame, an undercover CIA officer.

Last week Judith Miller of the New York Times was jailed after she refused to testify before a grand jury about her source. Matt Cooper, of Time magazine, had expected to keep his source a secret as well. But in dramatic fashion, just as he was about to persist in maintaining his silence, he said he received permission from his source to testify in court.

Mr Cooper has refused to identify his source publicly. But in this week's edition Newsweek said Mr Rove's attorney had confirmed that Mr Rove had discussed Joseph Wilson, a former ambassador who is married to Ms Plame, with Mr Cooper and that he gave Mr Cooper permission to testify. It is illegal to reveal knowingly the identity of an undercover officer, and the prosecutor has been searching for the source of the leak who revealed Ms Plame's identity, which was first reported by Robert Novak. (Financial Times)

[Of course, Rove will almost certainly avoid Federal Ass-pounding prison - even if proven to be a traitor - but it should, at least, put Bush short of one invaluable asset and one scandal closer to impeachment.]

"I have nothing but contempt and anger for those who betray the trust by exposing the name of our sources. They are, in my view, the most insidious of traitors."
Poppy Bush, 1999

KARL ROVE, FAIRY QUEEN OF THE GOP
July 7, 2005 (WASHINGTON, DC)

Bush Family retainer and Republican dirty trickster Karl Rove, under grand jury investigation for leaking the fact that Ambassador Joseph Wilson's wife Valerie Plame is a covert CIA operative, may face a stiff prison term, since "outing" an agent like Plame is a federal crime. Rove, allegedly a closet homosexual like other top leaders of the Republican Party, including RNC chairman Ken Mehlman and Republican apparatchiks Ralph Reed and Gary Bauer, may be preparing himself for the eventuality of prison, writes Al Martin, author of "The Conspirators: Secrets of an Iran Contra Insider."

"We have an update on Karl Rove, the Fairy Queen of the Gay Old Party. That's G.O.P. to the unenlightened," writes Martin in his column "Asset Protection: A Timely Update." (7-4-05) "The speculation is the grand jury will finger Karl as the leaker with regards to the Valerie Plame CIA situation. Then he's going to put Bob Novak right in the frame." (conspiracyplanet.com)

WORST PRESIDENT EVER TRAILBLAZES NEW DEPTHS
June 24, 2005 (ISTANBUL, Turkey)

"An international public opinion poll indicates the reputation and image of the US has deteriorated since the occupation of Iraq and that citizens of several countries now view China in a more positive light.

According to the results of the survey, 65 percent of British people have positive opinions of China as only 55 percent view the US positively. The survey shows that 58 percent of French people have a positive perspective on China, but only 43 percent have the same attitude towards the US. These findings are repeated in Spain and The Netherlands it is noted in the poll. Seventy-six percent of Spaniards think that US President George W. Bush is the main reason for anti-Americanism as do 65 percent of Germans and 63 percent of French. The US's reputation is also at its lowest level in its three Muslim ally countries, Turkey, Pakistan, and Jordan. Only one fifth of those participating in the public opinion poll in these countries have positive opinions about the US. Support for the US-led war on terror." (Zaman online)

"We don't want an America that is closed to the world.
What we want is a world that is open to America."
George H. W. Bush (good job on that, Chimpy)

KARL ROVE TALKS SMACK
June 22, 2005 (WASHINGTON, DC)

"Let me put this in fairly simple terms: Al Jazeera now broadcasts to the region the words of Senator Durbin, certainly putting America's men and women in uniform in greater danger. No more needs to be said about the motives of liberals." (Washington Post)

As a non-moron I had to laugh at the brass balls of Herr Rove to crack this soundbite. Then I remembered his people are actually responsible for the deaths of over 1,700 US troops so far. Now it doesn't seem as funny somehow.

TYRANTS IN UNDERPANTS: NEW FOX REALITY SHOW?
June 21, 2005 (BAGHDAD, Iraq)

Following the Saddam underpants leak last week (the leak being that of this candid snaphot to the Sun in London) the one-time murderous madman and friend of Reagan is in the news again. This from the London Times: SADDAM HUSSEIN likes corn chips, ping-pong and Ronald Reagan, and dreams of making a comeback in Iraq, even though he is reduced to washing his underpants in his prison sink, his American guards revealed yesterday...[He] insisted on having his drinks at room temperature and guzzled family-size bags of Doritos nacho chips. He liked Raisin Bran Crunch cereal, but implored his captors “No Froot Loops!” http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,7374-1662640,00.html

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